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Horror Stories: A Memoir
The two-time Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter behind the groundbreaking album Exile in Guyville traces her life and career in a genre-bending memoir in stories about the pivotal moments that haunt her.When Liz Phair shook things up with her musical debut, Exile in Guyville - making her as much a cultural figure as a feminist pioneer and rock star - her raw candor, uncompromising authenticity, and deft storytelling inspired a legion of critics, songwriters, musicians, and fans alike. Now, like a Gen X Patti Smith, Liz Phair reflects on the path she has taken in these piercing essays that reveal the indelible memories that have stayed with her.For Phair, horror is in the eye of the beholder - in the often unrecognized universal experiences of daily pain, guilt, and fear that make up our humanity. Illuminating despair with hope and consolation, tempering it all with her signature wit, Horror Stories is immersive, taking readers inside the most intimate junctures of Phair's life, from facing her own bad behavior and the repercussions of betraying her fundamental values, to watching her beloved grandmother inevitably fade, to undergoing the beauty of childbirth while being hit up for an autograph by the anesthesiologist.Horror Stories is a literary accomplishment that reads like the confessions of a friend. It gathers up all of our isolated shames and draws them out into the light, uniting us in our shared imperfection, our uncertainty and our cowardice, smashing the stigma of not being in control. But most importantly, the uncompromising precision and candor of Horror Stories transforms these deeply personal experiences into tales about each and every one of us.
Living with the Monks: What Turning Off My Phone Taught Me About Happiness, Gratitude, and Focus
Equal parts memoir and road map to living a less stressful and more vibrant life, bestselling author Jesse Itzler offers an illuminating, entertaining, and unexpected trip for anyone looking to feel calmer and more controlled in our crazy, hectic world.Entrepreneur, endurance athlete, and father of four Jesse Itzler only knows one speed: Full Blast. But when he felt like the world around him was getting too hectic, he didn't take a vacation or get a massage. Instead, Jesse moved into a monastery for a self-imposed time-out. In Living with the Monks, the follow-up to his New York Times bestselling Living with a SEAL, Jesse takes us on a spiritual journey like no other.Having only been exposed to monasteries on TV, Jesse arrives at the New Skete religious community in the isolated mountains of upstate New York with a shaved head and a suitcase filled with bananas. To his surprise, New Skete monks have most of their hair. They're Russian Orthodox, not Buddhist, and they're also world-renowned German shepherd breeders and authors of dog-training books that have sold in the millions.As Jesse struggles to fit in amongst the odd but lovable monks, self-doubt begins to beat like a tribal drum. Questioning his motivation to embark on this adventure and missing his family (and phone), Jesse struggles to balance his desire for inner peace with his need to check Twitter. But in the end, Jesse discovers the undeniable power of the monks and their wisdom, and the very real benefits of taking a well-deserved break as a means of self-preservation in our fast-paced world.
My Dog: The Paradox
Matthew Inman dishes another helping of hilarity from his online comic The Oatmeal in My Dog: The Paradox. After years of carefully observing his own dog, Rambo, Inman follows his #1 New York Times best-selling How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You, with this ode to the furry, four-footed, tail-wagging bundle of love and unbridled energy frequently dubbed man’s best friend.
The Introvert Activity Book: Draw It, Make It, Write It (Because You'd Never Say It Out Loud)
(Wire Coil/Wire Combination)
From the author of Introvert Doodles comes an illustrated, interactive book for introverts of all ages to express themselves, find their voices, and discover their own creative talents!Conventional wisdom suggests that people who don’t speak up have nothing to say, but introverts simply prefer to express themselves differently. Introverts are known for their creativity, their need for thoughtful reflection, and their preference for solitary activities, such as drawing and writing. The Introvert Activity Book offers doodle ideas, lists, paper-craft projects, writing prompts, and so much more - the reader becomes the author!Beautiful and messy, funny and insightful, inspiring and relaxing, The Introvert Activity Book is perfect for introverts at any age. Join the introverted animated comic character, Marzi, on a journey to discovering your creative voice within!
I'll Be There For You: Life According to Friends' Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, Ross & Monica
Full of inspiration, fashion tips, dating advice, trivia and hilarious quotes direct from Monica's apartment, I'll Be There For You puts you right on that Central Perk couch with Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, Monica, Ross and Rachel - the best Friends you ever had.
Scrappy Little Nobody
Even before she made a name for herself on the silver screen starring in films like Pitch Perfect, Up in the Air, Twilight, and Into the Woods, Anna Kendrick was unusually small, weird, and “10 percent defiant.”At the ripe age of thirteen, she had already resolved to “keep the crazy inside my head where it belonged. Forever. But here’s the thing about crazy: It. Wants. Out.” In Scrappy Little Nobody, she invites readers inside her brain, sharing extraordinary and charmingly ordinary stories with candor and winningly wry observations.With her razor-sharp wit, Anna recounts the absurdities she’s experienced on her way to and from the heart of pop culture as only she can - from her unusual path to the performing arts (Vanilla Ice and baggy neon pants may have played a role) to her double life as a middle-school student who also starred on Broadway to her initial “dating experiments” (including only liking boys who didn’t like her back) to reviewing a binder full of butt doubles to her struggle to live like an adult woman instead of a perpetual “man-child.”Enter Anna’s world and follow her rise from “scrappy little nobody” to somebody who dazzles on the stage, the screen, and now the page - with an electric, singular voice, at once familiar and surprising, sharp and sweet, funny and serious (well, not that serious).
Hyena is a collection of autobiographical stories by Jude Angelini, which takes the reader on his journey of heartbreak, depravity, and hilarity, deftly moving between his adult life and his childhood growing up in a factory town outside of Detroit. Each story is told with brutal honesty, yet maintains a gallows humor that will leave you shaking your head in disbelief. Jude is one of the top hip-hop radio hosts on Sirius Satellite radio. His self-published, print-on-demand edition of Hyena has been an indie bestseller, despite having no ebook or physical distribution. Its exploration of drugs, sex, and the human condition compares to Charles Bukowski, Hunter S. Thompson, Artie Lange, and Jim Norton. It also captures the hardscrabble culture, language, and landscape of post-industrial Detroit, from which came some of pop culture's most compelling artists.
This inspiring, honest, uproarious collection of essays traces Sebastian Maniscalco’s career from playing boxing rings and bowling alleys to reaching the pinnacles of comedy success.At twenty-four, Sebastian Maniscalco arrived in LA with a suitcase and saved up minimum wages. He knew no one and nothing about standup comedy, but he was determined to go for it anyway.At forty-four, he’s on the Forbes’ list of highest earning comedians, sells out arenas, and has starred in four hit comedy specials including Why Would You Do That? on Showtime.Stay Hungry tells the story of the twenty years in between. On the way from clueless rube to standup superstar, Seb was booed off stages; survived on tips and stolen food; got advice from mentors Andrew Dice Clay, Vince Vaughn, Tony Danza, and Jerry Seinfeld; fell in love; and stayed true to his Italian-immigrant roots. The one code that always kept him going: stay hungry, keep focused, never give up, and one day, you’ll make it.
Win Bigly: Persuasion in a World Where Facts Don't Matter
From the creator of Dilbert, an unflinching look at the strategies Donald Trump used to persuade voters to elect the most unconventional candidate in the history of the presidency, and how anyone can learn his methods for succeeding against long odds.Scott Adams - a trained hypnotist and a lifelong student of persuasion - was one of the earliest public figures to predict Trump’s win, doing so a week after Nate Silver put Trump’s odds at 2 percent in his FiveThirtyEight.com blog. The mainstream media regarded Trump as a novelty and a sideshow. But Adams recognized in Trump a level of persuasion you only see once in a generation.Trump triggered massive cognitive dissonance and confirmation bias on both the left and the right. We’re hardwired to respond to emotion, not reason. We might listen to 10 percent of a speech - a hand gesture here, a phrase there - and if the right buttons are pushed, we irrationally agree with the speaker and invent reasons to justify that decision after the fact.The point isn’t whether Trump was right or wrong, good or bad. Win Bigly goes beyond politics to look at persuasion tools that can work in any setting - the same ones Adams saw in Steve Jobs when he invested in Apple decades ago. For instance:• If you need to convince people that something is important, make a claim that’s directionally accurate but has a big exaggeration in it. Everyone will spend endless hours talking about how wrong it is while accidentally persuading themselves the issue is a high priority.• Stop wasting time on elaborate presentations. Inside, you’ll learn which components of your messaging matter, and where you can wing it.• Creating "linguistic kill shots" with persuasion engineering (such as “Low-energy Jeb”) can be more powerful than facts and policies.Adams offers nothing less than "access to the admin passwords to human beings." This is a must-read if you care about persuading others in any field - or if you just want to resist persuasion from others.
We Learn Nothing: Essays
In "We Learn Nothing," satirical cartoonist Tim Kreider turns his funny, brutally honest eye to the dark truths of the human condition, asking big questions about human-sized problems: What if you survive a brush with death and it doesn't change you? Why do we fall in love with people we don't even like? How do you react when someone you've known for years unexpectedly changes genders? With a perfect combination of humor and pathos, these essays, peppered with Kreider's signature cartoons, leave us with newfound wisdom and a unique prism through which to examine our own chaotic journeys through life. These are the conversations you have only with best friends or total strangers, late at night over drinks, near closing time.
A Brief History of Vice: How Bad Behavior Built Civilization
"Mixing science, humor, and grossly irresponsible self-experimentation, Evans paints a vivid picture of how bad habits built the world we know and love." --David Wong, author of John Dies at the End History has never been more fun--or more intoxicating. Guns, germs, and steel might have transformed us from hunter-gatherers into modern man, but booze, sex, trash talk, and tripping built our civilization. Cracked editor Robert Evans brings his signature dogged research and lively insight to uncover the many and magnificent ways vice has influenced history, from the prostitute-turned-empress who scored a major victory for women's rights to the beer that helped create--and destroy--South America's first empire. And Evans goes deeper than simply writing about ancient debauchery; he recreates some of history's most enjoyable (and most painful) vices and includes guides so you can follow along at home. You'll learn how to: * Trip like a Greek philosopher. * Rave like your Stone Age ancestors. * Get drunk like a Sumerian. * Smoke a nose pipe like a pre-Columbian Native American. A celebration of the brave, drunken pioneers who built our civilization one seemingly bad decision at a time, A Brief History of Vice explores a side of the past that mainstream history books prefer to hide.
Thanks, Obama: My Hopey, Changey White House Years
Remember when presidents spoke in complete sentences instead of in unhinged tweets? Former Obama speechwriter David Litt does. In his comic coming-of-age memoir, he takes us back to the Obama years. With a storyteller's attention to detail and a humorist's eye for the absurd, Litt uses his experience to address one of the most important issues facing today's America: the legacy and future of the Obama movement in the presidency of Donald Trump.
The Very Worst Missionary: A Memoir or Whatever
Wildly popular blogger "Jamie the Very Worst Missionary" delivers a searing, offbeat, often hilarious memoir of spiritual disintegration and re-formation.
NYC Basic Tips and Etiquette
Pyle, Nathan W.
Living in New York City for five years as a transplant from Ohio, illustrator and T-shirt designer Nathan Pyle was fascinated by the unique habits and unspoken customs New Yorkers follow to make life bearable in a city with 8 million people (and seemingly twice the number of tourists). Nathan decided to draw his favorite tips and etiquette lessons and post them on the internet, where his 12 original panels went viral immediately and became the basis for this hilarious illustrated book (check out the fully animated ebook, too!).In NYC Basic Tips and Etiquette, Pyle reveals the secrets and unwritten rules for living in and visiting New York including the answers to such burning questions as, which cabs should I try to hail? What is a bodega? Which way is Uptown? Why are there so many doors in the sidewalk? How do I walk on an escalator? Do we need to be touching right now? Where should I inhale or exhale while passing sidewalk garbage? How long should I honk my horn? If New York were a game show, how would I win? What happens when I stand in the bike lane? Who should get the empty subway seats? How do I stay safe during a trash tornado? Each tip is a little story illustrated in simple black and white drawings.Visitors and newcomers to New York will love it because the advice is smart, funny, and not condescending. New Yorkers will love it for its strategic and humorous approach to mastering the daily chaos of the city.
Poorly Drawn Lines: Good Ideas and Amazing Stories
Life is weird. Embrace it.A bear flies through space. A hamster suffers a breakdown. A child marvels at the wonder of nature as worms emerge from the ground to look for vodka (as they always have). Elsewhere, a garden snake is arrested by animal control and jailed for home invasion. These are common occurrences in the world of Reza Farazmand’s wildly popular webcomic, Poorly Drawn Lines. Traveling from deep space to alternate realities to the bottom of the ocean, this collection includes fan favorites alongside never-before-seen comics and original essays. For the first time, Farazmand shares his inimitable take on love, nature, social acceptance, and robots.
I Ain't Doin' It: Unfiltered Thoughts From a Sarcastic Southern Sweetheart
Social media comedienne Heather Land uses her trademark spunky, laugh-out-loud humor to remind us that real life can be real funny.
Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk
Featuring David Sedaris's unique blend of hilarity and heart, this new illustrated collection of animal-themed tales is an utter delight. Though the characters may not be human, the situations in these stories bear an uncanny resemblance to the insanity of everyday life. In "The Toad, the Turtle, and the Duck," three strangers commiserate about animal bureaucracy while waiting in a complaint line. In "Hello Kitty," a cynical feline struggles to sit through his prison-mandated AA meetings. In "The Squirrel and the Chipmunk," a pair of star-crossed lovers is separated by prejudiced family members. With original illustrations by Ian Falconer, author of the bestselling Olivia series of children's books, these stories are David Sedaris at his most observant, poignant, and surprising.
Kind of Coping: An Illustrated Look at Life with Anxiety
Maureen “Marzi” Wilson - the popular Instagram cartoonist behind Introvert Doodles - is back with a brand-new collection of hilarious, relatable, and heartwarming doodles about anxiety that show you that you are not alone. If you struggle with anxiety, you may feel like it’s you against the world all the time. Sometimes, your anxiety can be too much to handle all at once - wouldn’t it be nice to have someone around that understood exactly what you were going through?Meet Marzi! She struggles with anxiety just like you. In Kind of Coping, join Marzi as she (kind of) copes with her own anxiety from day to day, finding the humor in her condition with this collection of funny, encouraging, and supportive comics that show you the best you can do sometimes is just kind of cope - and that’s totally OK!Whether it’s a panic attack or an awkward social snafu, Marzi knows what you are going through. With over 150 full-color doodles that deliver hope and inspiration, unconditional support, and big laughs, let Marzi share her journey with you.
Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar . . .: Understanding Philosophy Through Jokes
This New York Times bestseller is the hilarious philosophy course everyone wishes they’d had in school.Outrageously funny, Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar... has been a breakout bestseller ever since authors - and born vaudevillians - Thomas Cathcart and Daniel Klein did their schtick on NPR’s Weekend Edition. Lively, original, and powerfully informative, Plato and a Platypus Walk Into a Bar... is a not-so-reverent crash course through the great philosophical thinkers and traditions, from Existentialism (What do Hegel and Bette Midler have in common?) to Logic (Sherlock Holmes never deduced anything). Philosophy 101 for those who like to take the heavy stuff lightly, this is a joy to read - and finally, it all makes sense!
The Seven Good Years
The seven years between the birth of Etgar Keret’s son and the death of his father were good years, though still full of reasons to worry. Lev is born in the midst of a terrorist attack. Etgar’s father gets cancer. The threat of constant war looms over their home and permeates daily life.What emerges from this dark reality is a series of sublimely absurd ruminations on everything from Etgar’s three-year-old son’s impending military service to the terrorist mind-set behind Angry Birds. There’s Lev’s insistence that he is a cat, releasing him from any human responsibilities or rules. Etgar’s siblings, all very different people who have chosen radically divergent paths in life, come together after his father’s shivah to experience the grief and love that tie a family together forever. This wise, witty memoir - Etgar’s first nonfiction book published in America, and told in his inimitable style - is full of wonder and life and love, poignant insights, and irrepressible humor.
Laughter Totally is the Best Medicine
Reader's Digest magazine has been the source of humor for decades. In this all-new collection, we've gathered the most hilarious jokes, quotes, anecdotes, cartoons, and one-liners that celebrate life's funniest moments.
Black Man, White House: An Oral History of the Obama Years
Hughley, D. L.
For two centuries, presidents hoping to secure their legacies have sought out biographers. But who could possibly capture the inspiring yet bizarre reality of the first black man to call the White House his crib, a tenure that brought hope, change, and health care to millions, but also spawned birthers, backlash, and the bewildering rise of Donald Trump? Thankfully, as the end of President Barack Obama’s pioneering two terms in office drew near, the First Lady had a stroke of genius: “Honey, all these presidential biographies are written by old white guys. Why not hook a brother up for once?”Enter D.L. Hughley. When the comedy legend got the call from the White House, he knew this was the assignment of a lifetime. Of course he would become a political biographer: what else could his decades of experience bringing unflinching truth and hilarity to the American people have been building toward?And so D.L. proudly raised his finger to “The System”* and set out to record a true and accurate** oral history of the Obama years, interviewing everyone from Obama’s esteemed Democratic colleagues in Washington to Republican pols who dare not speak his name and segments of the “conservative base” who have irrefutable proof that Obama is a Kenyan-born Muslim and Saddam Hussein’s second cousin thrice removed AND a Coldplay fan. Protected by the Patriot Act and the promise of a presidential pardon, Hughley bitch-slapped virtually every rule of journalism in pursuit of his mission: hacking into Hillary Clinton’s private e-mail server; infiltrating Trump’s tanning sessions; staking out each of Mitt Romney’s 752 mansions; even eavesdropping on Bill Clinton’s late-night escapades.At the end of it all, Hughley had bravely assembled an explosive dossier that would make Edward Snowden (and even the NSA) blush. Black Man, White House is the culmination of these extraordinary comedic efforts, an authoritative work on the Obama presidency that is destined to enlighten and entertain patriots, scholars, and Yes-We-Can’ers for generations to come.
The Greatest Love Story Ever Told
Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman reveal the full story behind their epic romance--presented in a series of intimate conversations between the couple, including photos, anecdotes, and the occasional puzzle.The year: 2000. The setting: Los Angeles. A gorgeous virtuoso of an actress agreed to star in a random play, and a basement-dwelling scenic carpenter said he would assay a supporting role in the selfsame pageant. At the first rehearsal she surveyed her fellow cast members, determining if any of the men might qualify to provide her with a satisfying fling. Her gaze fell upon the carpenter, and like a bolt of lightning the thought struck her: no dice. Moving on.Yet, unbeknownst to our protagonists, Cupid had merely set down his bow and picked up a rocket launcher . . . that fired a love rocket (not a euphemism). The players were Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman, and the resulting romance, once ignited, was . . . epic. Beyond epic. It resulted in a coupling that has endured to this day; a sizzling, perpetual tryst that has captivated the world with its kindness, athleticism, astonishingly low-brow humor, and true (fire emoji) passion.How did they do it? They came from completely different families, ignored a significant age difference, and were separated by the gulf of several social strata. Megan loved books and art history; Nick loved hammers. But much more than these seemingly unsurpassable obstacles were the values they held in common: respect, decency, the ability to mention genitalia in almost any context, and an abiding obsession with the songs of Tom Waits.Eighteen years later, they're still very much in love and have finally decided to reveal the philosophical mountains they have conquered, the lessons they've learned, and the myriad jigsaw puzzles they've completed. Presented as an oral history in a series of conversations between the couple, the book features anecdotes, hijinks, photos, and a veritable grab bag of tomfoolery. This is not only the intoxicating book that Mullally's and Offerman's fans have been waiting for, it might just hold the solution to the greatest threat facing our modern world: the single life.
Woman First: First Woman
The long-awaited memoir of her tumultuous year in office, A Woman First: First Woman is an intimate first-person account of the public and private lives of Selina Meyer, America’s first woman president. Known and beloved throughout the world as a vocal and fearless advocate for adult literacy, fighting AIDS, our military families, and as a stalwart champion of the oppressed, especially the long-suffering people of Tibet, President Meyer is considered one of the world’s most notable people. In her own words, she reveals the innermost workings of the world’s most powerful office, sharing previous secret details along with her own personal feelings about the historic events of her time.In A Woman First: First Woman, President Selina Meyer tells the story of her times the way that only she could, Readers will gain new insights not only into Meyer herself but also the mechanics of governing and the many colorful personalities in Meyer’s orbit, including world leaders and her devoted cadre of allies and aides, many of them already familiar to the American people.
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